Tentative Parenting : For the Love of a Child

  "Some say  the soul of the child looks down at the world,  

Looks at every soul that resides in every woman.   

The child then chooses his/her mother..."

Diwali makes me sad - it reminds me of all the Diwali's that I am going to celebrate without Bapa. So yesterday - I got myself a big bar of chocolate, a box of tissues and a DVD (Fault in our Stars). I had a wonderful pity party after K2 went to bed -- there was chocolate, and there were tears ... I woke up in the morning all stuffed up. 

Work was busy and I was able to put sadness aside and focus on the work at hand. I picked K2 in the evening (K1 is busy at a conference the next couple days) and showed him some beautiful pictures of Diwali Sweets on Facebook (all this as we were waiting for our Fish Tacos at The Grill House). He gave me a solemn look and said - Ma, I remember Aai making this -- why don't you try making it at home?

Now I have a confession to make - I love to eat, to cook -- not so much. But when my child was asking me for Diwali sweets, it shall be so. I donned my virtual apron and whipped up some goodies in the next two hours. He ate 2 of each of the Laddus  ( I made Besan Laddu, Rava Laddu and Kajju Peda ) - I am sure it's sugar overload but Diwali comes but once a year! 

# 1  I am A-ok  walking down unfamiliar paths  for my child (I made Besan Laddu and Kajju Peda for the first time ever)
#2 I appreciated his honesty - he didn't want me to outsource making the sweets -- he wasn't pushy but he made his point well
#3 I want K2 to experience Diwali like I experienced it - the excitement of new clothes, crackers, sugar overload and just being surrounded by family
#4 I want K2 to remember Bapa - we sat down and looked through our India/Diwali Album and talked about the fun one month in Pune. This was not a melancholic time for us but rather a time to revisit good memories...

Love you Bapa...Happy Diwali - K2 and I remembered you today and I ate a couple Laddus for you!