Body Positive!

"I'm not fat But I feel So Heavy, I feel my arms jiggle, I feel too big Uncomfortable in my own skin, I am not fat, But I feel So Heavy, I wish I weighed Nothing at all." 

I was the fat kid all my life ( think 5'3'' and ~ 180 lbs and right now at Size 4 and 120 lbs I still feel like the fat kid...Only one in seven Americans feels “body positive.”... It takes women half their lives to achieve half the level of body self-esteem as the average teenage male -- a whopping 66% of teenage girls are either body negative or body ambivalent...Ouch! (Source : Yahoo Health). 

So for me, as I strive to lose a couple more lbs, I want to do it while I nourish my body, spirit and mind. I want to remain in shape and get strong - so that I can be a positive role model for my son. I want to remain in shape for myself ...so that I can jump up and dance when I want to, climb the high mountains and see the world upside down from a Yoga posture...body strong, body positive!

I will blog my healthy (and not so healthy habits) for the next 6 months as I slowly but surely make progress. For today I want to share my healthy vegetable haul...

Self Compassion (Banish the inner critic!)

"Self Compassion is simply giving the same kindness to ourselves that we would give to others"

Such a simple concept on paper but so hard to practice. This weekend I had to cancel not one but two of my weekend free classes as my body wouldn't cooperate and I was doing what I do when I am having a massive mental tug of war...I was talking to myself aloud in the kitchen as I was making my son's breakfast (he was sitting at the table with his air pods and I assumed he was busy in whatever robotics match he was watching and couldn't hear me ). Here's how the one-way conversation went :

Me : Darn it - I am weak!

Me : Why didn't I just plough through the pain with Advil and teach?

Me: I am not committed enough to exercising

Me : I am not disciplined

Me : I have already gained 10 lbs at FB...wait for it it will get worse !

Me : My students will all leave me

I feel a tap on my back and my son was towering over me and he says : Ma you got this, it's ok its just one class, you are consistent and your students get it !!! And you are awesome! (Context - this is the first time he has said that in a loooooooong time!)

Made me sit up and think about how much we end up having these one-sided conversations where we beat ourselves up into a corner....why not change that conversation we have with ourselves...