Saturday, August 29, 2015

Tentative Parenting : Dealing with Uncertainity

My son started 4th Grade on Wednesday - new teacher, some old friends and mostly new experiences. He jumped out of bed with a smile and said - Ma, I am ready. He did hold our hands briefly while walking to school but once there he quickly got his bearing and was ready for any curve ball life had to throw his way.

Ironically about the same time K2 was dealing with ambiguity in his life I was thrown a curve ball at work - rather than talk about what it was -- I will tell you that it has a reasonably large impact on my professional life. I don't know if I handled it with the same maturity and grace that my 8 years old showed, however I did want to share my learnings 

# Replace expectations with plans - this works really well for me as I am a planner - instead of expecting the future to give me something specific, when I am focused on where I want to get and how I get there -- I feel more comfortable.

#Be confident in your coping mechanisms - I am a typical Product Manager - I think of multiple outcomes for the same thing and usually plan for the worst one...I was pleasantly shocked when I read the book, The Positive Power of Negative Thinking,  (man! I should have written this book!) I was really on to something with defensive pessimism—when you consider the worst so you can plan how you’d handle it (without letting it bog you down!), you are mostly covered.

#Practice Mindfulness and Gratitude - As I was kissing my son Goodnight last night, I realized that I had been given a veritable treasure - a great family, good health, no wants and am a working mom who is able to balance her career & personal responsibilities. The reality is I know all this is transitional I might have this today and not have it tomorrow. I am grateful for what I have now...

# When all else fails go  Zumba - My best grief & stress management tool is Zumba (hands down) - Guess who went Zumba yesterday...thanks to my awesome friends and instructors for the extra love and the chance to drown my sorrows in sweat

Note to Self and Krish - Life as we know it is changing...however ambiguity is a beautiful thing - it presents wonderful opportunities. Take a minute to miss the old, then look ahead and prepare for the new.